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On Friday I met up with an artist after work. We enjoyed some wine, and promptly tumbled into his bed together. By 9:30pm I was home again.

I doubt she shall see each other again.

When I said to a friend of mine that I now looked forward to being in a relationship as opposed to random encounters, he remarked that he “preferred shagging”.

These, I suppose, are simply artistic preferences.

Part of the difficulty in any relationship is predicting the preferences. The Artist, as it turned out, liked to narrate whenever he found one of my preferences. Not something that is entirely welcome during an intimate situation.

Perhaps it is just my old fashioned romanticism, or the small part of it that still exists, but the notion of creating and building a relationship with someone else seems to my mind much more satisfying than a series of random encounters. However pleasurable they may be.

But how do we decide on artistic preferences?

Strength? Wealth? Fine eyes?

The next time I enter into a relationship, I am determined that it will not be dictated by these things, but by the alternate quality which we cannot tell, predict or describe. Something by which we feel connection, mutual respect and admiration for the other person.

I want to feel that mutual strength, admiration and respect which comes from finding someone whose sensibilities are in tune with our own.

I suppose my artistic preferences run to someone with artistic preferences.

It just wasn’t found in this artist.

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