Usually I hate that phrase. It reeks of idiotic Mormon teenagers (or teenagers in general) claiming all that bullshit about waiting until marriage to fuck each other’s brain out.
And speaking of fucking each other’s brains out,you’ll all be proud to know that that was precisely what I was offered tonight.
We’ve chatted a bit and he seems nice. Again, he’s someone I connected with through this app friends put me in touch with, frequented by members of the BDSM communities. He’s someone who is into the same things, secretly, that I am. We have fantasies that we want to carry out on each other.
But he’s also handsome, and seems like he could be a genuinely good guy. When we were discussing potential dating days, it was either tonight, or in two weeks’ time. I so wanted to meet him properly, to connect with him and share some of the lust-filled things we walked about, but something stopped me.
We’d also talked about Japanese culture and travel. It felt like this had something more to be. On consulting with a friend, he told me to wait.
So I waited.
Did I make the right choice?
Should we just grab the opportunities as they come, or is a relationship that starts off fuelled by lust just doomed to fail? Where do we draw the line?
They say that if it’s meant to work out, it will; what will be, will be. If that’s the case, does it even matter what we do? The same friend I consulted with reprimanded me before for having fuck-fests with Chris. “Treat it like a Grindr date and a Grindr date is what it will be,” he told me. But in the same vein, his boyfriend likes to say how their courtship was a complete shambles.
Should we give in to our desires, or is it restrain which builds a successful relationship?
To say it takes restrain just reeks of old world Victorian values, which seems to make no sense. It’s 2015; surely the rules are all broken and it’s only what we make them. Surely we’re at a point where we can do, say and feel what we want without fear of reprimand or censure.
But when it all comes down to it, does first encounter sex still destroy everything.
Are we still expected to wait?