Apparently, Bank Holiday weekends, like the one we just had in the UK, are my cosmic window for meeting men. I can go for months seeing only weirdos and oddballs, but for the last 2 bank holidays I have been blessed to meet someone truly extraordinary.
The last time it was Wilt. This time, it was James.
We went for brunch on the Saturday, after chatting for a few rounds via app, then a view more via WhatsApp. A mutual interest in gaming, geek culture and assorted other topics was enough to warrant a meet before I had to meet my friends in the afternoon.
At first, I couldn’t find the coffee shop he was in. As I walked through The Street next to Westfield, I saw in front of me a tall broad-shouldered man. He was well over 6 ft in height, his sleeveless top revealing toned arms and broad shoulders. As he turned around, I saw that it was him. His face broke into a smile and he pulled me into a hug.
As we sat down to eat, I could feel the connection growing. We could quote Futurama and Family Guy back to one another. Everything that was said was done so with ease. I wanted to stay with him all afternoon. Truly, I felt that I could tell him anything. There was a sense that I was meeting someone profoundly special. I cannot explain how or why, I just felt that there was something deep and unexplained moving between us. Perhaps I was just imaging it, but I swear that I felt connected with him in a way I have rarely, if ever, felt before. It was a feeling that couldn’t be explained simply in the arresting nature of his eyes, the stimulating mode of his conversation or the base lust for his body I could feel. It was all of them combined, and then something else. Something other that I can’t explain.
As I went to leave, he gave me a swift kiss. And then another. We didn’t want to part, but we made arrangements to meet again on Monday.
By 12:30, we were in central London together. Cake at Patisserie Valerie. Lunch at a delicious Thai joint. Everything was so easy, so natural. There was no pretence and no pressure. Within minutes we were holding hands, within hours we couldn’t keep our arms from going around one another.
We went further into our shared interests and the connection grew deeper, until we found ourselves back at my place. We began to kiss, and the hairs on his upper lip and chin were light and teasing. He lifted me onto his lap and I straddled him. As our fingertips explored one another’s back, I had the completely novel sense that, although we barely knew one another, we understood one another’s bodies instinctively. I had never had someone who I felt understood so wholly and completely my physical desires, who could unlock my body with such ease.
And everything about him was just sexy. His body, his eyes, his voice. All of it turned me on so I felt like I could come for days and days. I lay warm in his arms, thinking how wonderful it would be to wake up with him. When I voiced that thought, he simply replied with “Well…we will have to try it, won’t we.”
I walked him to the station and we said goodbye. “I’ll see you around,” he said.
Was it just me, or did it seem like an awkward goodbye after such a special day?
As we messaged later, he said he definitely wanted to meet up again, which alleviated my fears somewhat.
Yet the week started to drag by, and I couldn’t get a firm answer from him. When he said that he would be unavailable for 2 weeks due to work, I asked if this was a polite way of saying that he’d rather just be friends.
He replied that it wasn’t the case, but that the upcoming medical symposiums would be commandeering all his time. I took him at his word, but a part of my mind is still uneasy.
If you’re really that into someone, surely you make time?
But if he wanted out, why didn’t he take the offered option?
I want to see him agian. Truthfully, I burn for him. It has been so long since I met someone like him. Not a fleeting fantasy like Wilt, but a proper man I could fall for. A man with a strong body and a gentle soul. I feel like we…
But I dare not go any further in case it all falls apart. In case I get a nonchalant text in 2 weeks saying he’s been seeing someone else or that he’s “too swamped” right now to pursue a relationship. I just have such a strong sense that we could make each other happy. I hardly ever connect with a man, and I don’t think I have ever felt on such short acquaintance that there was someone who completed me so wholly; who was like the other side to my coin.
I can only pray now that he does not disappoint me.