Well, they offered me the job at the online poker company. And I’ve found a new place to live near central London. It should all be coming together…So why am I filled with so much trepidation?
Now I have to make a decision. The agency, or the poker company?
Looks good on the CV.
Stress and work/life balance.
More fun and possibility of travel.
Switching jobs after only 3 months.
Not as sexy on the CV (maybe).
Oh Lord, what do I do? And my probation ends this week too. The agency could offer me a generous offer to stay with a new title and everything. But is it really worth it when every single week at least twice I feel like I want to vomit from the stress? When at least twice that I want to turn and punch my boss square in the face just for being such a twat? I may be good at what I do there, I may be a valuable asset to the agency, but I don’t enjoy it. I don’t get up every day excited and inspired by the challenge.
And the clients? So dry. So dull. So demanding. The time pressures and stress drain any enjoyment out of the projects themselves, which should be enjoyable. They’re just…not.
Sometimes I think in life I’ve made some really bad errors in judgement. I wanted to act, sing, write and make art. Those were always the things I loved and came naturally to me. Somehow, that’s become a career in social media marketing. I guess there are worse things it could have become. I still have my writing on the side, I have my fiction and this online journal. Maybe one day I’ll make that into some sort of career. But for now…
Now I think that the poker company is the way to go. I think, I’m not certain. But if I am to work, it should surely be in an area that excites and stimulates me. I love the game of poker and I love that world. I love its wild characters and its dark glamour. I love that the people are so clever and, often, frighteningly intelligent.
One of the biggest clients I’ve been working on at the agency is a major finance brand, hugely international, and you wouldn’t believe the stupidity of them. I mean, really, it’s just full of people trying to justify their own job by making everybody else’s as hard as possible. I’ve seen copy editing take weeks. Weeks! And I’ve watched senior marketing managers demand tweets be re-written that they’ve already approved. I watched one man once at a gig I was managing the social media for sit and ponder a tweet I’d composed for 15 minutes. He wasn’t sure if the exclamation mark was “on brand”. Fucking fool.
You see, agencies have to put up with those sorts of idiots because they’re the client, and the client pays the bills. Especially a large international client like that one, who pay some very large bills indeed. They can afford a bunch of tools to work for them, so we at the agency just have to grin and bear it. Even when it is the right side of ridiculous.
So, the poker company it is. Unless the agency can make me a very tempting offer.